Auf Wiedersehen Wieners!

9 December 2011
Vienna, Austria

Auf Wiedersehen Wien!

Today was the last official day of the mutual vacation—we must disembark our lovely ship tomorrow, and Julie will be returning home. I, however, will be hanging with the Sapps in Bratislava, Slovakia for a few more days. I may or may not blog about that part of the vacation—I haven’t yet decided and since this is my blog and therefore my prerogative, you’ll know when I know!

Today was a day spent entirely in Vienna. We began our morning with a driving tour of the Ringstrasse, the Ring Road, which is the circular road around the inner city of Vienna. It is similar in concept to the Washington D.C. Beltway, but it is surface roads, not interstate, and is in the midst of the city. It goes past key attractions, like the major churches, the exhibition Ferris Wheel, and the State Opera. The buses then dropped us at the Schonbrunn Palace, the Imperial Summer Palace. I could tell you a lot about the Palace, but as I have remarked before, it is exceedingly difficult to take notes while following a tour guide, and the book I bought to help me remember is packed in my luggage. I can, however, tell you that it originated as a hunting lodge, and that the name Schonbrunn means “beautiful fountain”. The hunting lodge burned down, and Maria Theresia (who was technically never crowned Empress, but ruled as both the woman behind the man and as regent), in a fit of keeping up with the Jones (well, technically the Louis’s), decided to rebuild it to rival Versailles. I have to say, she was successful! This palace, again in the Baroque style (trending toward Rococo), is absolutely stunning. It is either more fully restored than Versailles, or was never allowed to fall into the state of disrepair that persists at Versailles. It has beautiful gardens (they were pretty even in December—imagine what they would look like in the summer!) and several fountains. We had to use our imaginations about the fountains, because nearly every fountain we’ve seen since we arrived has been shrouded in a complicated wooden device obviously designed to protect them from freezing. Some of them are pretty significant feats of engineering!

We had a private tour with a lovely Viennese tour guide named Elfi, and she was just as cute as you imagine her to be from her name. According to Christine and Andy, she’s actually a retired tour guide, but will help out in emergencies. She was maybe five feet two inches tall, with bobbed grey hair and huge tortoiseshell glasses, and she was dressed entirely in shades of brown: dark brown skirt, tights, and shoes, with a tan sweater and beret. Even her nail polish was brown! I wanted to put her in my pocket and bring her home with me, she was so cute! She really knew her stuff, that’s for sure! (In fact, I have been completely impressed with all the local guides Tauck has used throughout this trip—all of them have been incredibly knowledgeable and charming.) Elfi was VERY concerned because there was one group admission ticket for two of the Tauck groups, and it was not in her control. (The Palace has timed admission, and our group of 35 was not allowed through the admission turnstile until we scanned our ticket at the appointed time!) This got resolved in short order (frankly, I think Elfi would straighten out the Syrian situation after having tea and a biscuit—she just seems the type) and in we went. Some portions of the palace are under active restoration, and there is scaffolding up in the rooms. But here’s the neat thing: they (the curators? The restorers? Somebody.) have created these enormous posters that hang on the scaffolding to give the impression of what SHOULD be there. We’ve actually seen that a lot in both Germany and Austria—much prettier to look at than nasty old scaffolding.

One thing that Versailles and Schonbrunn have in common is the CROWDS. Dear God—a flying elbow here and there was required just to keep up with Elfi as she moved through the tour. Yikes. However, instead of the Asian tourists we fought off at Versailles, the vast majority at Schonbrunn were Italian. Apparently, the Feast of the Immaculate Conception (which was yesterday, not the Feast of the Annunciation as I may have told you) is a public holiday, so many of them took today off, too, and came to Vienna to Christmas shop. You couldn’t stir ‘em with a stick!

We had plenty of time to visit the Christkindlmarkt at Schonbrunn Palace. It was lovely and open, with lots of high quality handcrafts. Sadly, (and I NEVER thought this could happen) I am starting to get shopped out! (I wonder if I need a shopping sabbatical?? Perish the thought—economies of several countries are now depending on me!) All I bought was a little book about the Palace and this neat painted tin wreath of flowers. (I have seen decorated tin ornaments several places, as well as elaborate soldiers and chess sets...they are apparently very popular here.) We had my personal favorite, crepes, for lunch at the Palace (Nutella for me, ham and cheese for Julie…I just cannot embrace the wurst and schnitzel the way I should. As far as countries go, I have tremendous affinity for the architecture and urban planning of the Germans and Austrians, but my gastronomic love and adoration is reserved only for the French.).

After lunch, we got back on the buses to be dropped off in town at the market at the Maria-Theresienplatz. I am sad to report that the crushing crowds extended to the roads—it took us almost 45 minutes to cover the distance it had taken us about 15 to traverse early that morning. I think we could have walked faster! But we persevered and eventually made it. Julie and I had mapped out a route that departed from the Maria-Theresienplatz through the three key shopping streets in Vienna: Karnterstrasse, Graben, and Kohlmarkt. This route was mapped out for maximum shopping impact: we hit the handicrafts market at Karlsplatz, the Hotel Sacher, J & L Lobmyer glass, Swarovski (which is Austrian, by the way), the Lippizaner chocolate store, Frey Willie (a jewelry store Julie was interested), Demel (one of the premier pastry shops in Vienna), and the Spanish Riding School (where the Royal Lippizaner stallions are trained and perform). We managed to at least see all of these (with the exception of the riding school—we followed a sign that pointed toward the school, but never saw the actual entrance to the dratted place), but we did not manage to get into all of them. The crowds were smothering—you couldn’t even get IN the door at Demel. I quickly lose interest in pretty much anything in a crowd like that. They could have been giving the stuff away and it wouldn’t have been worth that! Regardless, we did a drive-by on all of it!

When we returned to the ship on the 4:30 shuttle, it was time to pack. (Well, mostly Julie—I did a preemptory packing last night and just had to put a few things in tonight. Like I said, I can get off the ship without resorting to a plastic shopping bag.) We were able to get all of Julie’s things in her suitcase before it was time to go to the Captain’s Farewell cocktail party and dinner. (I’m sure the captain is glad to see the backs of some of these people, frankly.) The cocktail party was quite lovely, with champagne and hors d’oeuvres, and the White Elephant gift exchange. I think I told you my White Elephant gift was pretty good—a rubber ducky-themed bath stuff kit I’d assembled in Regensburg. Well, I got a Christmas tie in return. Not only do I not wear ties, I don’t even KNOW anybody who wears ties anymore. I did, however, notice that tour-guide-Andy was wearing a Christmas tie, so I offered him another one for his collection. (It was actually a pretty tie, red with white snowflakes, just not something I needed.) Well, the amazing Christine decided that I needed my very own gift and procured (probably from the magical purse) a new gift for me, and it was way cool: a perfume atomizer that looks like a pen! Now that’s something I can use!

After the gift exchange, it was time for dinner. Once again, we ate with our Tennessee friends, and we’re certainly glad we did, because it took two hours to eat dinner. (I understand this was experiential dining, and that there were 107 people that had to be served six courses (amuse bouche, soup, starter, sorbet, entrée, and dessert), but you’re dealing with a girl who eats a sandwich most nights—15 minutes, max!). The amuse bouche was duck something or other, which got a pass, as did the cappuccino of horseradish with beet foam soup. The fish starter was pretty good, but the sorbet was WAY too boozy for me. I could smell it before I could taste it! For dinner, the choices were lamb (nope…not taking a bite out of Lambchop), veal (unh-unh), or porcini (mushroom) something or other, which is a lose-lose-lose proposition. Fortunately, Mischa had figured out that you could ask for a chicken breast, and we both did and it was good. The dessert course deserves high praise: the waiters all came in with trays of Baked Alaska that were filled with sparklers! They plated the dessert onto plates that had “Tauck” written on them in chocolate, along with a chocolate cream puff, a chocolate dessert cup of chocolate mousse, and a teeny-tiny little fruit tart! It was adorable, even if I did give the fruit tart a pass. (I was a little disappointed, though, because I think my portion of Baked Alaska came from the Aleutian archipelago or something, because my chocolate layer was missing. Or maybe I didn’t ever have a chocolate layer—mine seemed boozier than the others!) After dinner, we said good-bye to the girls, then came back to the room to finish packing. And we both made it!

One final thing to share: the Tennessee girls taught us the funniest saying. When looking for a man, you want him to be suave and debonair, or as they say in East Tennessee, “swave and de-boner”!

And with that, I’ll bid you all Auf Wiedersehen for a while!

Love,
Heidi